Arre ye ladka to bada Seedha-Saadha hain. "SSA"

SSA- Seedha Saadha Aadmi. 


To know more about SSA's check my post here.


Every once in few days I have been habituated since childhood to hear the following condemned words:


'Arre ye ladka to bada seedha hain.' or 'bada he seedha-saadha ladka hain aapka' et al.
(Oh the boy is so innocent... or Your child is very innocent)


All these words are such an insult to some one who all his childhood dreamed of being a kid to be known as:


'Arre ye lada to bada bhoukaali hain' or 'Bada hi bhoukaali ladka hain aapka'
(Oh the boy is a deadly thug.... Your child is such a big mafia)
bhoukaali: Don type powerful, mafia typz personality.. get the picture?


Such were my simple and innocent dreams of mine of being the Hindi Cinema's one of the best villains:  Shaakaal

Shakal had pet Sharks which were made to feed on his enemies. Well when I was a kiddo all i could imagine was being a SUPER MAFIA DON whose name was enough to make people wet in pants and sweat in hands. I would think of the most cruel ways of torturing my victims in my super-specialty prisons. My pet Komodo dragon lizards would sit on my shoulders and hunt on my preys:

But then my aspirations did not meet my actions. I failed to be a qualified member of any gang during my school time. Worse than that I was not even involved in a hands-on-fight with a worthy foe which would have unleashed the devil in me and I'd have proven to the world of my hidden draconian intentions. Not even in college such an opportunity materialized. Though some gangs did come in contact and some warlords did consider me for recruitment but then that was ragging time they were on lookout for new recruits, fresh blood to carry their legacy forward.


Time passed and my gangster worshiping attitude found for itself no outlet in the actions. In fact it seemed pretty obvious to me where my life was now headed. I was becoming the SSA of the society. SSA's are wonderful people they don't know how to say NO. How to react, be really street smart and acting all smart Alec hoodwinking people.. all the necessary talents to survive and thrive in the fast paced world. SSA's are not foolish enough to not understand that they are being used. And this is where I am seem to be heading, the Anupem Kher of Khosla ka Ghosla:

   
So many times in my life I have single minded goals of achieve the character of kaminapan.. but then the training is not right. All this idealism and books live in my head and corrupts me. I need more training to achieve atleast 10% characteristics of Shakal ji. 


Amen.

"Kaushik ek din teri achchai tjhe le doobegi"

"Kaushik one day your goodness will drown you"

-A very wise man who knows me and is known by the name of Gautam Dhameja.

WARNING: The following post contains convoluted self-analysis.. it is a cruel dissection with no rona-gaana about wicked fate and evil people. You may waste your time reading this as i am wasting time writing it! ;) okkk that last line i was just kidding!

As I rushed to meet my friend Gautam in Noida for a urgent crisis for which the clock was ticking faster than Bolt runs his sprints. I tried to be a good samartian and helped a passer-by in which as usual i made a fool of myself. (don't investigate further details its my blog and i ain't gonna tell :) )

I narrated the incident to Dhameja and he offered me the golden words of wisdom-

"Kaushik ek din teri achchai tjhe le doobegi"

Then a thought process complicated than a chain reaction and more explosive than the anti-matter ( just finished Angels and Demons) started in my head. It's proven beyond doubt that the "seedha-saadha" Parv Kaushik has always suffered in the face of "tez-tarrar" people. People often tend to confuse kindness with weakness ( yes i stole it from Swordfish when John Travolta says it to Hugh Jackman)

The seedha-saadha aadmi (SSA- THE SPECIES I CONSIDER I BELONG TO) is almost extinct now. It does not even figures in the endangered species list. Probably SSA is going to be in the next issue of 'Lost Species Of 21st century'. The characteristics of the SSA species are as follows:

1. These species carry a malfunctioning hereditary DNA of imaandaari "honesty" in them.

2. They are genuinely nice to everybody and fail to prioritize their behaviour in relation to the returns expected from other members of other species. (I call it 'selective affability')

3. These species as predicted by Gautam Buddha speak the truth and live the condemned life. They walk on the path of the truth and pay for it- Buddha.

4.They can easily be trapped and fooled once you present a rosy picture and behave nicely. SSA's are easily trusting hence the annihilation of the species.

5. Docile species rarely reacts even when it sees it is being harmed. People often see it as SSA's foolishness. ( which I'm afraid we are - foolish)

6.Will always fail in business bcuz thy will be too shy to ask for their own money.

etc. etc. etc.

Since I'm currently reading "The Curious Case Of Dog In The Night-time" by Mark Haddon let me analyse my kryptonite (seedhapan) the way the lead character Christopher would. Let me like Kaavya Vishwanathan's Opel Mehta chalk out steps to end my kryptonite and enter into the skin of normal human species to survive.....

WAIT.. WAIT.. WAIT..

DO I REALLY WANT TO?

Let me get this straight. I touch my heart and i ask myself... If I want to change? Can i change? I think the world is full of smart and over-smart people. It's OK being a fool. It's OK to trust people even when you know they don't deserve it. Trusting is important, people are not. A clean heart and a clean conscience is all i have and perhaps all i need. I look around at the insanity around me lifestyle addiction, politics, jealously, hatred, anger. I'm happy being a kid in adults world.

Yes I'm an SSA but yes i can say with my held held high that there ain't no person whom i cannot look into the eyes. Believe me I can. I did commit mistakes i did disappoint people but in my heart i know I'm pure. Let me suffer it's OK but somewhere deep down inside i know when Dhameja sleeps tonight he'll know they are still nice people around. There are people ain't mad after money, sex, power, fame.

I don't know how many would have left before reading and comprehending any of this stuff. At last i don't think i can change. Its a handicap may be. But if you ask my heart I'll happily renounce the material world for a clear conscience before i die if that's the price for it. May be I'll survive in this jungle may be i wont but i want to sleep tonight peacefully.